Idolization and obsession with other people is a common “method” of engaging with the world today.
It showcases a severe lack of integrity with one’s self, and a constant searching for oneself “outside”.
That's okay.
The pattern can be reversed and turned into self-accountability.
This idolization of others has deep psychological roots.
It is like an addiction that is attempting to be filled by “masturbating” to the vicarious viewing of other people’s lives (or the lives they choose to advertise to the world).
Much of this is based on egoic fantasies and illusions.
Many of the people are playing games with others, and all in all it is the endless cycle of seeking attention and validation from complete strangers all over the world.
A bit of a cringe fest, as all parties beckon for the approval from people whom they don’t know.
Or endlessly, addictively, view the cellular devices and put more focus into mindlessness rather than the development of their own souls.
In this article I will detail some steps one can take to break the addiction of outsourcing one’s experience of life (masturbating) and begin to actually build a life one can be proud ov and honors one individual essence.
These steps are basic principles that can be applied to anyone’s existence, and will likely produce positive net results in beginning to authentically express oneself.
If you have read the two part series on how to think for yourself, those articles are good additions to this article.
Here are the links for part 1 and part 2
Without further adooo, let’s get into it =]
First: Why Does This Happen?
Many young people have been raised with technological devices from an early age.
The generations younger than me (and I am still in my twenties) have been raised with “smart phones” since they were toddlers.
I have seen many kids between the ages of 2-5 playing with “their mommy's” cell phones (mostly while the fathers are out of the picture!).
This habit forms addictions to the phone for any human being, as the way the apps are designed are in such a fashion that they trigger reward systems in the brain when one engages with them.
In terms of identity and self-development, the lack of basic cultural infrastructure (such as rituals, rites of passage, and collective cohesion) influences the lack of personal identities that drive one to seek out examples in the broad world of the internet.
This lack of social infrastructure, and typically the lack of strong family and communal connections, tends to contribute to a great wound in many people.
This wound is characterized in a lack of strong personal identity and outlook in life.
A rootlessness.
When someone feels that the wound within themselves the drive for acceptance and validation is amplified into adulthood and makes one a slave to the opinion of others and the mass herd.
When the herd is being driven by forces of trauma, or the herd itself lives by philosophies that are inherently false, this can cause a life-time of seeking outside validation before the individual may grasp their own inner world and claim the power that is inherent to them - to stand tall, still, silent, or be expressive and loud when they desire.
The entire value system and motivational system of a human being is altered when they are caught in this loop of seeking outside validation, and likewise the operating system of a liberated human being is in it’s own category.
These deep wounds from childhood neglect and social incoherence in youth are what I see driving this incessant need to parade oneself (whore oneself) out to the world and dance in a feeble attempt to gain social acceptance and "credit".
Emptiness.
This doesn’t mean that posting online and advertising one’s lifestyle is inherently wrong or “bad” in some way - just that the motivations for people are typically coming from an aspect of oneself that is existing in a state of "disempowerment".
It’s coming from desperation to be accepted, rather than thinking for oneself and expressing one’s inner world clearly.
Expressing what one truly thinks and feels in order to build something that is long lasting and taps into deeper levels of human to human interaction and connection.
This is why “killing one’s idols” is an important part of the process when becoming an individual with independent thinking.
To be able to question one’s idols instead of taking their words or projected images on blind faith.
To keep everyone on equal footing when it comes to how every individual is “seen” and processed.
We are all humans.. and what is exceptional does not need to “convince” through charisma and fluffy lifestyles.
Through advertisements and disengenuious pandering to the crowd.
When something is real - it speaks for itself through raw data, experience, and evidence.
It stands strong and grows because it is real and makes differences in the world that supersede what one may “think” about it.
It delivers results, and this is the same with people.
Character stands strong when there are deceptions being thrown about in acts of character assassination and slander.
What is real is ultimately revealed and this is a process of social alchemy.
How To Grow One’s Individuality
The path of individualism has been near and dear to me for awhile.
It’s a path that drives one to be their own unique version of what a human is, while remaining connected to that which is objective.
Like cuisine, there area many different kinds of dishes that can be served from many different cultures.
It’s difficult to say what is “objectively” better in quality dishes.
A delicious meal of stuffed portobello mushrooms with marinated chicken compared to an asian fusion dish of raw delicacies…
Sometimes it only depends on what mood one is in.
Yet all of these different kinds of foods from all over the world, still utilize basic foundational principles (and ingredients) to make their unique expressions in the art of “food”.
Human beings are no different, and in the path of individualism the goal is to not become some quirky freak that is in a fantasy world all by themselves.
Quite the opposite - perhaps being quirky is a part of it, though every human is designed evolutionarily to add value to their families and communities.
To be an individual thinker is to have a capability of thinking outside the box for the benefit ov a collective (and one’s own self in order to advance).
Today, many are handicapped in their ability to critically think, which is no fault of their own on many fronts.
Socially, we are trained to fit into a society that was designed to create slaves (and is evolving into a system that is designed to aid the individual, depending on what systems and groups of people you engage with).
Sure, there are players in this game who believe and adhere to a paradigm of control (due to their own ignorance).
There is also a growing international network of communities, people, minds, and individuals who are “seeing the light” and building a new paradigm collectively (no matter how directly connected they are - this is a psychic and collective emergence that is taking place more and more directly by the day).
Az we continue to build this liberated international system, the ability to critically think about our philosophies will continue to be paramount in order to maintain integrity.
What is worth keeping (what are gifts from the ancestors)?
And what would they be equally proud of us to let go of and optimize?
That is where our role is paramount, in deconstruction of that which doez not work and the creation of new and established systems that promote the freedom of the human spirit from the time of conception, all the way through to death and beyond.
That is the legacy we are creating and the essence of what some call “The Great Work” of humanity’s evolution.
We are evolving, and it begins with the individual.
The more the individual can be themselves and feel the deep connections to those around them… the more fulfilling and honoring of this mystical experience of life really is.
Below are some practices and habits one can utilize to cultivate their individuality and reclaim their freedom (on a biological level).
It is natural for us to look to examples, yet it is ultimately our destiny to claim who we are and look upon others with admiration without retracting from our own sense of self.
This is done by building reality and having evidence of our efforts and concentration.
I hope these practices aid you in becoming the best version of yourself possible, and aids you in your own weaving of preferred timelines of character development!
1: Meditate
Before you roll your eyes and scroll past this one, let me offer you a unique perspective on why meditation is essential for the development of one’s individuality.
Self in-powerment comes from self-knowledge.
True power within oneself (not manipulative power that is an illusion and comes from insecurities and fear based motivations) comes from unlocking one’s inner potential.
The inner potential in us is like a labyrinth, and becomes unlocked when we are able to map the labyrinth and becomes masters of it.
When we are masters of our inner worlds.. having cultivated a mentality that essence that is encoded with virtue, we are better able to comprehend our own inner operations and this frees up our ability to think.
It allows us to think more clearly, in more long-term strategies, and aids us in building connections that are based on deeper layers of being.
This process of unlocking one’s potential opens up the doors of possibility for enriched lives characterized by more opportunities, emotional stability, and in-joyment of life itself.
There are many ways to meditate, though I recommend simply sitting in a quiet environment (with the spine erect) and simply getting to know the inner world within you.
The goal is to simply be aware of how you are operating, how you are thinking, and what you fantasize about.
Become aware of all the motivations that drive you.
Get to know yourself, and liberate yourself from the layers of egoic thinking that drive your behavior.
Once this is done to a sufficient degree, limitations dissolve and major life improvements can take place in a short period of time through acting on higher leverage opportunities.
The power of thy word increases.
This is why meditation can be (And is for many) essential in liberating one’s mind from the limitations.
It propels one forward into being an asset to themselves and others.
2: See The Other Side
Many times in life we can have blinders on to the world and the things we especially are attracted to and in-joy.
We can put on “rose-colored glassed” and ignore the signs that things aren’t what they "seem".
In the context of idols and idolization - this is especially true.
It is important to train one’s mind to observe the inconsistencies and question reality, to question people’s “image”.
This allows us to live in reality instead of a fictional world.
No fantasy is worth the cost of not seeing reality for what it is.
Reality is where there is power - in that which is objective and real.
Interpretation of reality is also important, and it is important to question one’s own perceptions of life as well - which is the same process ov “seeing the other side” ov one’s own persona and life style (instead of something outside of yourself).
When looking to outside sources for validation, it can be extremely illuminating (and humanizing) to truly observe what is being put out into the world and question what it all means.
What drives this person?
What message does this person truly have?
What is the reputation of this person and who are they really?
Getting a grip on these kinds of questions allows one to show up in reality in a far more grounded and anchored fashion.
It also sets one up to form real connections based on facts rather than shared (and agreed upon) fantasies for the sake of boosting the ego.
That which is fake always falls short at some point… best to build strong foundations and truly grow into one’s power through authentic action and expression.
So don’t be afraid to peer at the “other side”… the unseen.
It is there that you can gain trust and build connection, while also saving yourself from being mislead by potential charlatans and compulsive liars seeking to take others “on a ride”.
Be strong, be courageous, and be observational.
3: Learn to Receive
Many of us in the world are learning the art of energetic exchange and how to trade our energies affectively.
Being able to receive the world, and truly comprehend it on an energetic plane will provide many great insights and give one the raw data needed to form “unique” opinions.
It is by observing that which is occurring (and feeling that which is occurring in the “unseen realms”) that allows one to tune into what is happening.
To feel, to receive, is to gain insight.
It is to see the real intentions of other human beings and of the creations made by other human beings.
To tune into another, and receive what they are sharing, gives massive insight into their inner world and allows you to connect to the best part of people.
That essence within that is seeking to express itself and shine the light outward.
That essence is what wants to arise in everyone.. to shine brightly.
When you are able to see the raw data without your own triggers getting in the way… that is #liberation.
4: Dance With Polarity
When you feel stuck, or that you would benefit from refreshing energy, don’t be afraid to alter some of the polarities that are in place in your life.
What I mean by this is simply introducing opposites from what you normally do (within reason).
This change in energy offers novel experiences that can aid one in liberating their own thinking.
An aspect of individuality is targeting the stagnant parts of one’s own mind and shaking those parts up a little.
Don't be afraid to do what the opposite of what you would normally do.
Too rigid? Introduce some chaos.
To chaotic? Establish order.
5: Do What You Want To Do
To do what one has always wanted to do (instead of being immobilized by fear) is a great way to begin to activate one’s own ability to think for oneself and act as an individual free agent.
Many people scroll endlessly through social media because deep down they simply haven’t mustered up the strength to do what it is that they really seek to do and build.
Instead of acting on their own dreams, and changing their lifestyle, they sooth themselves by watching others do things that they want to do.
They become consumers and gluttonous with their media consumption, while their perspective of self continues to become diluted and sad.
What cancels this process out is simply doing what one wants to do, which involves building trust with one’s intuition and guidance.
This can be small things such as giving a celebratory high five to someone, to acting on a business idea that comes in strongly.
It requires for doubt to be transformed.. which is done most effectively by consistent action and follow-through with different ideas.
That process of completing an idea in the real world is what builds experience, and experience builds true wisdom and power.
It gives one the raw data needed to think for oneself, and to build one’s own sense of personal identity.
6: Be Opinionated
Learning to express one’s viewpoints and opinions is part and parcel of becoming a liberated human being (an “individual”).
Learning how to express oneself (by doing it) then engaging in the arena of friendly debate (or intense conversation) aids one in building up their own viewpoints and opinions.
When one is able to detach their ego from the ideas they believe in - debate becomes a fun and interesting process of “sharpening eachother's swords”.
It can be seen as combat.
It can be seen as a dance.
It doesn’t mean that people have to be hurt, or have hurt feelings when engaging in a debate.
This is the art of rhetoric.
If someone is holding desperately onto a limiting belief.. conversation may shed light on that which will allow integration to occur.
The point here is - there is nothing wrong in expressing one’s viewpoints and opinions.
There is nothing wrong with speaking one’s mind.
Many people feel tyrannized by everything under the sun.
That should not stop us from voicing ourselves.
Those who are too immature to have conversations with sort themselves out one way or another.
Whether by attempting to shut down the freedom of speech (and hopefully failing) or by simply excluding themselves and moving on from real conversation…
The strong will always be attracted to the light that shines through a bright mind.. a thinking mind.
It is worth slaying a few false belief systems in order to showcase what one’s inner world truly is.
That way true friendships can be forged and built on strong foundations of mutual value systems and coherent thinking.
A Word On Technology
Much of the fetishism that occurs with glorifying false idols is in the space of social media (i.e. technological spaces).
It is for this reason that taking a break (prolonged) from social media can be extremely beneficial to those who are suffering from subconscious patterns of fetishizing their idols online.
Whether identified as idols or not - those who one is obsessed with (low-key or otherwise) are indeed the idols one upholds.
It’s of-course okay to look to examples in order to better oneself… however the point of this article (or one of them) is to showcase that the ability for one to cease the masturbation inherent in idol worship and instead embrace one’s own brightness of mind is the ultimate long term solution for baseline contentment and the sweet-injoyment of life.
It is necessary to live life instead of wasting it scrolling endlessly.
Technology is great in many ways.
It aids humanity in advancing.
However, we are animals.
As animals, we may need to take actions to return to our nature.
If you have technology addiction - I recommend setting the phone down and living in reality for awhile.
Then see who you are.
Last tip: Keep a Journal
Write down your honest thoughts and observe who you are.
Develop the mind.
Prune that which does not serve.
Aid the growth of that which takes you farther and farther.
Aho! That's it for this article. Stay tuned for more content and psychological exploration of the "matrix" and what lies beyond (investigation and building).
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Until Next Time
"Epiphany"